Rose-ann was in mourning. The funeral was this afternoon, and she was unprepared for the grieve that flooded her stomach. It had been churning and bubbling all night, and she woke up vomiting. All things must die. She knew this. But she felt that she was barely out of mourning her parents death seven years ago, and now she had to deal with more death. Things had gotten progressively more and more out of control when they died. And now...more letting go. Rose-ann didn't know if she would survive this funeral, this death.
Karen would be there at noon. To begin the process. Rose-ann wanted to bar the door. Barracade herself in her house. Shut out the world and it all seeing eye. She felt that the mess that her life was in was on display, and she wasn't ready to bury that chaos that had become her world. But Karen would be there at noon, and would not be put off.
Rose-ann sighed. It was time to let go.
She continued to tape together the boxes that Karen had brought over from the U-Haul store. A stack of folding tables stood ready in her garage. It would be the garage sale of the century! Rose-ann was digging out from under her piles and piles of fabric, buttons, beads, lace, trims, and findings. This was the last day of her hoarding of cloth. Karen was on her way, and this was the day that Rose-ann and Karen would box up fabric , buttons, beads, lace, trims and findings for a massive yard sale. Rose-ann had promised she would end her fabric addiction and her hoarding. And, she had committed her home to a Book Woman Club meeting in August!
Rose-ann rose, pushing aside the cardboard boxes she had been assembling, to go over to a five foot tall pile of fabric in her living room. Somewhere underneath was a couch she hadn't seen in at least five years! She ran her hands along dusty cottons, and dug deep in the stacks to smooth out taffetas, brocades, velvets and woven tapestries. Rose-ann just loved the touch of fabric; the feel of it's textures on her hand, on her face. She lifted a piece of Kenti cloth and smelled it woven edges, remembering the smell of Africa that summer in Bonwire, the village where she had bought the woven length in.
Suddenly, Rose-ann gathered a pile of cloth in her arms, her eyes wide and darting wildly from side to side! Her heart began thudding in her throat, beating against her veins in her neck painfully, and Rose-ann's lips parted in loud panicked breaths! Where could she hide this cloth, so Karen could not find it? Where would it be safe from the up-coming purge? Where? Where? Rose-ann began to run to the back of the house, and tripping, fell on her face in the back hall, knocking down huge piles and bins of fabric that reached from floor to ceiling! She struggled to get out of the piles of cloth, gasping for air as bin after bin, pile after pile of fabric covered her! She was drowning and she kicked her feet, flaying her arms out in wide arcs in an effort to tread above the depths of smothering fiber! Rose-ann began to scream, to yell for help, but she was the only one in this house of madness. She thought, if a pile of fabric falls in a hall and no one is there to hear it.....! She fought her way out of the hall, swimming over, under, through layer after layer of cloth! Finally, laying on wood, she drank deeply the dust and lent filled oxygen, gasping and coughing, crying and sobbing! As the dust and lent settled, and her tears and panic dried on her cheeks, Rose-ann pulled herself up.
She slowly crawled to the living room, and pulled herself up on a chair, the only cleared space in the house, and reached for a flat square of cardboard. She began to put together another box. The funeral was to begin at noon. Karen was coming, the only mourner besides herself that would attend this secret and priavate ending. All things had to die. And, Rose-ann knew her fabric addiction had lived out it's life expectancy!
Sunday, April 21, 2013
Saturday, January 5, 2013
"Carmen"
The Book Woman Club has not been meeting! It's recording secretary has continued to drop the ball, but is picking it up again! Check out my November 14th, 2011 story "Carmen" before reading this entry. Carmen is trying to find Erica before her very angry husband does.....
Carmen left Bessie Davis Hudson's house with frown lines folding down her forehead. She needed to find Erica before Pedro found her. As gentle as Pedro was with her, he could not seem to keep his fists off Erica's face! She was going to have to move her time-table with Pedro up a month or two! What was Erica thinking? Disappearing like this and scewing up Carmen's plan! Where could she be?
Sweat filled Carmen's armpits as she turned onto James Street, heading back towards downtown Syracuse. The humidity of the Syracuse weather and Carmen's fear for Erica radiated their sour smell through her sweat. She had to find Erica before Pedro got to her! She damned Erica, and she damned herself for not being at the Book Woman Club in time to pick Erica up! Carmen thought back on the afternoon that she had spent with Pedro and shivered. He had gotten a babysitter to watch the kids while he was with Carmen. He had taken his time, and had not left an inch of her body untouched. She shivered again. That's why she was late picking up Erica! Pedro must have left Carmen and gone home to release the babysitter right away! She thought she had enough time to get Erica and give her a ride home before Pedro got impatient. He was such a bastard!
Carmen was jerked out of her thoughts, spotting Erica and an older woman coming out of a big house near the corner of James and Tealle Ave.! Carmen slammed on her brakes, and pulled her car over, the brakes screeching as she threw her bright red convertible onto the curb! "What the hell is wrong with you!" The driver behind her screamed a profanity as he pulled around her, his fist raised in the air! Ignoring him, Carmen she jumped out of her car, leaving the motor running, and ran over to Erica and the elderly woman. "You need to come with me, NOW!", she shouted, and grabbed Erica's arm. "Carmen! You're hurting me!" Erica pulled her arm away from Carmen, rubbing the bruises that didn't show yet, but had begun to throb under her skin. "Pedro is driving around looking for you, and he's really pissed!" Panic rose in Erica's eyes! "But he said I could go to the Book Woman Club Meeting! He knew I was there!" "Yeah, he's been to Ms. Hudson's house and made a big scene! Said you were late getting home! He had all the kids in the car!" "But I'm not that late! You weren't at the meeting, so I was walking home. I just stopped for a few minutes to talk to my friend Ms. Celeste!" Erica turned to the older woman. "This is my friend that I told you about...Carmen this is Ms. Celeste." "Nice to meet you, Ms. Celeste." Carmen pulled impatiently at her sweat drenched shirt. "Erica told me alot about you... I don't mean to be rude, but we got to go, now! Now, before Pedro drives by and sees us! Sees you!" Carmen grabbed at Erica's arm again, but let go when Erica winced. Glaring at Carmen, Erica rubbed her arm, and then turned to Celeste and gave her a big hug. "I got to go. I'll try to come see you soon, ok?" "You could stay here, my child! You know you can stay here! I don't want you to get hurt!" Celeste gently took both of Erica's arms by her wrinkled hands, their touch soothing the bruises that were forming from Carmen's roughness. She looked deeply into Erica's eyes, her own eyes reflecting the fear that filled Erica's face. "You don't have to go back there! You can make a choice, right now, and change your life, Erica! Stay!" Erica's eyes brimmed with tears and she shook her head. She whispered, "I have to go! I have children. I can't just leave them!" Tears of resignation and defeat ran down Erica's cheeks. Celeste repeated what she had said so many times to Erica, hoping that she would hear them this time. "I have room for all of you. The door is open!" "I can't! I just can't!" Erica pulled away from Celeste. "Yes, you can! You can, Erica!" Celeste took a step towards Erica as Carmen pushed Erica towards the car. "Come on Erica, we got to go!" Carmen voice rose as she frantically scanned the street. Carmen turned to Celeste as she and Erica began to move towards the car. "When she's ready, Ms. Celeste. When she's ready, I will bring her myself! I'll take her home! He won't hurt her if I'm there! I promise!" Before Carmen and Erica could get to the car, Pedro came barreling down the street. His car rocked as he swung it in a wide arc to park at an angel in front of Carmen's convertible, the back hanging out into James street and blocking any possibility of escape! "Bitch! Where the fuck you been?" Pedro shouted as he jumped across the hood of his car, the screams and wails of the children pouring out of the car windows! Carmen swung Erica around, sending her running back towards Celeste's house, using her own body as a sheild between the raging Pedro and the terrified Erica! Pedro threw his body towards Erica. "Bitch! Where you think you going? Don't you run from me!" He leaped across the sidewalk and shoved Erica to the ground, trapping Carmen under Erica as they both fell! "No, Pedro, no!" Carmen's screams mixed with Erica's as Pedro raised his fist! Carmen tried to crawl out from under Erica's weight; tried to sceam through Pedro's rage, begging him to hear her! "Don't do this Pedro! Don't...." Blood filled Carmen's mouth as she felt the the blows of Pedro's fist travel through Erica's face, to her face! "Please, Pedro, please!", Carmen's screams mingled with Erica's as blow after shared blow fell. She saw stars, comets, the flaring of a million suns as she began to black out...
Carmen left Bessie Davis Hudson's house with frown lines folding down her forehead. She needed to find Erica before Pedro found her. As gentle as Pedro was with her, he could not seem to keep his fists off Erica's face! She was going to have to move her time-table with Pedro up a month or two! What was Erica thinking? Disappearing like this and scewing up Carmen's plan! Where could she be?
Sweat filled Carmen's armpits as she turned onto James Street, heading back towards downtown Syracuse. The humidity of the Syracuse weather and Carmen's fear for Erica radiated their sour smell through her sweat. She had to find Erica before Pedro got to her! She damned Erica, and she damned herself for not being at the Book Woman Club in time to pick Erica up! Carmen thought back on the afternoon that she had spent with Pedro and shivered. He had gotten a babysitter to watch the kids while he was with Carmen. He had taken his time, and had not left an inch of her body untouched. She shivered again. That's why she was late picking up Erica! Pedro must have left Carmen and gone home to release the babysitter right away! She thought she had enough time to get Erica and give her a ride home before Pedro got impatient. He was such a bastard!
Carmen was jerked out of her thoughts, spotting Erica and an older woman coming out of a big house near the corner of James and Tealle Ave.! Carmen slammed on her brakes, and pulled her car over, the brakes screeching as she threw her bright red convertible onto the curb! "What the hell is wrong with you!" The driver behind her screamed a profanity as he pulled around her, his fist raised in the air! Ignoring him, Carmen she jumped out of her car, leaving the motor running, and ran over to Erica and the elderly woman. "You need to come with me, NOW!", she shouted, and grabbed Erica's arm. "Carmen! You're hurting me!" Erica pulled her arm away from Carmen, rubbing the bruises that didn't show yet, but had begun to throb under her skin. "Pedro is driving around looking for you, and he's really pissed!" Panic rose in Erica's eyes! "But he said I could go to the Book Woman Club Meeting! He knew I was there!" "Yeah, he's been to Ms. Hudson's house and made a big scene! Said you were late getting home! He had all the kids in the car!" "But I'm not that late! You weren't at the meeting, so I was walking home. I just stopped for a few minutes to talk to my friend Ms. Celeste!" Erica turned to the older woman. "This is my friend that I told you about...Carmen this is Ms. Celeste." "Nice to meet you, Ms. Celeste." Carmen pulled impatiently at her sweat drenched shirt. "Erica told me alot about you... I don't mean to be rude, but we got to go, now! Now, before Pedro drives by and sees us! Sees you!" Carmen grabbed at Erica's arm again, but let go when Erica winced. Glaring at Carmen, Erica rubbed her arm, and then turned to Celeste and gave her a big hug. "I got to go. I'll try to come see you soon, ok?" "You could stay here, my child! You know you can stay here! I don't want you to get hurt!" Celeste gently took both of Erica's arms by her wrinkled hands, their touch soothing the bruises that were forming from Carmen's roughness. She looked deeply into Erica's eyes, her own eyes reflecting the fear that filled Erica's face. "You don't have to go back there! You can make a choice, right now, and change your life, Erica! Stay!" Erica's eyes brimmed with tears and she shook her head. She whispered, "I have to go! I have children. I can't just leave them!" Tears of resignation and defeat ran down Erica's cheeks. Celeste repeated what she had said so many times to Erica, hoping that she would hear them this time. "I have room for all of you. The door is open!" "I can't! I just can't!" Erica pulled away from Celeste. "Yes, you can! You can, Erica!" Celeste took a step towards Erica as Carmen pushed Erica towards the car. "Come on Erica, we got to go!" Carmen voice rose as she frantically scanned the street. Carmen turned to Celeste as she and Erica began to move towards the car. "When she's ready, Ms. Celeste. When she's ready, I will bring her myself! I'll take her home! He won't hurt her if I'm there! I promise!" Before Carmen and Erica could get to the car, Pedro came barreling down the street. His car rocked as he swung it in a wide arc to park at an angel in front of Carmen's convertible, the back hanging out into James street and blocking any possibility of escape! "Bitch! Where the fuck you been?" Pedro shouted as he jumped across the hood of his car, the screams and wails of the children pouring out of the car windows! Carmen swung Erica around, sending her running back towards Celeste's house, using her own body as a sheild between the raging Pedro and the terrified Erica! Pedro threw his body towards Erica. "Bitch! Where you think you going? Don't you run from me!" He leaped across the sidewalk and shoved Erica to the ground, trapping Carmen under Erica as they both fell! "No, Pedro, no!" Carmen's screams mixed with Erica's as Pedro raised his fist! Carmen tried to crawl out from under Erica's weight; tried to sceam through Pedro's rage, begging him to hear her! "Don't do this Pedro! Don't...." Blood filled Carmen's mouth as she felt the the blows of Pedro's fist travel through Erica's face, to her face! "Please, Pedro, please!", Carmen's screams mingled with Erica's as blow after shared blow fell. She saw stars, comets, the flaring of a million suns as she began to black out...
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